You know that feeling when you just keep turning round and round?
The thoughts are whirling through your head and it feels like you’re really busy, but really, you’re just standing still? Stuck in thoughts and emotions that are going round in circles? Endless analyses and the same emotions coming back over and over?
It’s frustrating as **** (insert your favorite four-letter expletive here).
It feels like you’re STUCK. And you just can’t get out of it because… you’re… STUCK. That’s the definition.
Let’s pause for a second.
The first step is acknowledging that you’re stuck. From there, it’s a bit easier to get unstuck. In fact, there’s a lot you can do! The trick is to do the right thing at the right moment.
When you’re stuck, you’re often either (A) avoiding feeling something or (B) giving an experience too much importance.
That’s why you need to follow these three steps when you’re stuck.
- Engage with/Acknowledge your stuckness.
- Relax around/Accept your stuckness.
- Turn your attention elsewhere/Take “unstuck” action.
Stuckness works a bit like this:
When you’re stuck, you’re fighting something.
That’s the irony: The more you fight it, the more you entrench yourself in the stuckness. It’s like Devil’s Snare (you know… Harry Potter 1? If you fought it, it would grasp you tighter? And the only way of defeating it was to know what it was & then to relax? It’s exactly like that) or a chinese finger trap (for the non Harry Potter fans hehe).
The more you fight, the more you’re trapped.
That’s where key #1 comes in: Engage with the stuckness. Get curious. What are you fighting? What are you doing? What are the elements of your stuckness? How does this particular stuckness work? Bring in massive awareness.
Now that you’re aware, relax. Every time you relax in an area that used to be engaged in fighting, you regain some of your energy back. This is key #2: The more you accept & work with the stuckness, the more it dissolves.
Now that you’ve dissolved the stuck energy, you can apply it to something else! Something fun! Something that moves you towards where you want to go! Welcome to key #3.
Feeling stuck? You can use these 42 strategies to engage with, accept & move through your stuckness.
Key #1: Engage with the stuckness. || Awareness
Your aim is to gain awareness with curiosity and openness, not to judge yourself further for being stuck. You’ve probably done enough of that.
- Feel the stuckness in your body.
- Ask someone to listen to you. Either quietly or reflecting back to you what they hear.
- Get honest with a journal. Start every thought group with the words “The truth is…”. Very quickly, you’ll drop into what’s true for you.
- Identify the different parts of you that are stuck/fighting.
- Name the different emotions
- Name the thought clusters that are whirling through you.
- Ask “is this true?” about the thoughts that are swirling in your head.
For more like this, check out Byron Katie & The Work.
- Get clear on what you no longer want in your life.
- Identify what function staying stuck has.
- Identify what you’re clinging to.
- Identify what questions you’re asking yourself that are leading nowhere.
Key #2: Relax around the stuckness. || Acceptance
- Allow the different emotions to move through you without resisting or reacting.
- Surrender Control.
- Trust the Universe for taking care of you.
- Pray for guidance in accepting the situation.
- Ask for insight in moving through it.
- Say “Fuck it” and stop worrying about something.
- Pick a mantra along the lines of “I choose to relax about this”, “I choose to let go”, “I am willing to change”, “I am willing to grow out of this stuck place”.
- Ask the Universe for what you DO want
- Take a break from thinking about it
- Remember that everyone else is somehow suffering or stuck too. You’re not alone.
- Let Go
Key #3: Get moving on a new track. || Action
So there’s a “stuck track” in your life. Change gears. Do something different entirely. Place your attention on something different entirely. OR use the energy liberated from accepting to move forward.
- Do something KIND for someone else
- Practice Gratitude
- Choose a motto
- Go for a run/swim/bike ride
- Watch inspiring clips on youtube
- Take action on a project that’s important to you.
- Do something you’ve been procrastinating.
- Go on Quests:
- Find 5 beautiful things.
- Investigate something you’re curious about.
- Get 3 people to smile at you.
- Name 3 things that inspired you.
- Write 5 sentences about one thing you’re grateful for.
- Find questions that make you feel alive.
If you’ve been stuck for a long time now, and none of these strategies seem to help, ask for help. I have 30-min community oriented karma sessions available. I can offer a listening ear and reflect back to you what I hear. This often helps clarity come in in a big way. It’s free. Schedule Here.
I can also offer you energy work & guidance to how to listen to yourself so that the stuckness can dissolve. We can talk about it on the phone (for free!).
Not ready to communicate with me in that way yet?
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